Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
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Monday, February 28, 2005okay.. i'm happy... i seriously could have fainted at the chair i was sitting... Mrs Heng was like "li xuan, u've improved a lot... u've got an L1R5 of 12!!!" and i was like "ARGGGGHHHHHH" seriously i was jumpin away like some mad woman, and goodness i was wearing normal bra k, and super unused to it, so ya, u know wad i felt when i was jumping.... :X oops... hehe...okay i'm super happy now, but at the same time, damn worried for u-know-who. i mean half of me really want to just talk to him and tell him to cheer up, but i'm really afraid i'll make things worse... i don't wanna know how much he got. i just want him to know tt no matter wad happens, it isn't the end of the world. i mean i know its easy for a mad happpy person like me, but haiya! i dunno lar... i really want him to cheer up. he looks much better when he smiles, have i ever said tt? :) haha.. okay okay i'm going nuts.. going to play badminton with mei yi and wei keat... haish, got this feeling mei yi's going to be late again as usual... hai whatever lar, guess i gtg sleep now, otherwise u'll see a panda bear 2mr.. if u do see me tt is... :) Friday, February 25, 2005well i confessed. i said it. some would understand, some won't. but ya, surprisingly i wasn't upset when he didn't have any reaction. yup. but i do feel kinda upset now, cos i made him promise tt we'll always b friends but then, ya... he assured me again and again tt he'll be able to act normal but i don't think so... cos he isn't right now... and i don't like tt... i really just want things the way they were when we first started talking... i liked it tt way... oh goodness.... really i can't figure y of all pple him... stupid me... can't stand it... haish...ARGH!!! 1. i'm getting all jittery with the results coming out on monday... and having received the NIE letter didn't help. in addition, i have a really bad feeling bout it. 2. i liked someone when i'm leaving the school and never gonna see him again. and i liked someone who insults me, treats me as if i'm insignificant, and now we're not talking, and i find myself liking him more... what an idiot i am... freak. i'm just not feeling really happpy now... i'm confused... i don't know if i really want to go to tpjc if i do well... i really don't... someone help? Wednesday, February 23, 2005today was yet another day of school, but.... BUT... something interesting happened... keke...okay, basically a large percentage of the pre-u 1s in MI(bartley campus) didn't go to school today cos of ya, a long reason... and so my darling mei yi called me in the morning at around 6.40 to give me a surprise... guess wad she said... "cartan arh, can i come to ur school today" and this was through sms mind u... and pls, it was already 6.40 so u can imagine how shock i was lar, so i called her, and we made plans... she was to reach srjc by 9.15 latest... but this isn't the real surprise, i was even more taken aback when i saw mei yi's fren, cos i would never have expected him to drop by so ya... honestly i was momentarily stunned... but very happy for mei yi also... cos... haha... *zip* i'm not saying further... but ya! haha... *oops* anyways tt was the best part of today lar, but i think the best best best part was seeing them together... *grinz* hehe... *chuckles* okay okay, better not say anymore, later my tongue get chopped off... ;) okay, but the rest of the day didn't go so well, especially not the last period... oh well, heck... i shouldn't care right, i mean ya, why bother... .: honestly, this is marvellous, fancy liking someone who just totally embarrassed me in front of the whole freaking class today. like thanks... i have no idea why i would like him okay, really... first, i'm insignificant to him. second, he like somebody else ready lar. third, i was so bloody insulted in front of the class by him. do u know how much tt hurt? oh goodness, i nearly cried can. i mean wad can i do if i'm born with a voice like tt, am i suppose to change my voice or scream till my voice breaks is it? look, i didn't even tell my friend tt u said she's "teh" lor, i knew u were talking bout me okay... how can u be so insensitive. i don't get it. i know im insignificant but can u at least not hurt me, at least until u leave which is tomorrow?! this is sickening, trust me, fancy liking someone like that for the first time... freak man, i'm so totally screwed... argh! :. "Beverley Knight - Shoulda Woulda Coulda "People say that together we were both sides of the same coin That we would shine like Venus in a clear night sky We thought our love could overcome the circumstances But my ambition wouldn't allow for compromise I could see in the distance all the dreams that were clear to me Every choice that I had to make left you on your own Somehow the road we started down had split asunder Too late to realise how far apart we'd grown. How I wish I, wish I'd done a little bit more Now " Shoulda woulda coulda," means I'm out of time Coz "Shoulda woulda coulda", can't change your mind And I wonder, wonder, wonder what I'm gonna do "Shoulda woulda coulda" are the last words of a fool People ask how it feels to live the kind of life others dream about I tell them everybody gotta face their highs and their lows And in my life there's a love I put aside, cause I was busy loving something else So for every little thing you hold on to, you've got to let something else go Chorus] Fool if I would now forsake the opportunities are fate I know I'm right where I belong But sometimes when I'm not so strong I.. [Chorus (x2)] Monday, February 21, 2005great i've to update a sad entry twice, know y? cos my other entry wouldn't save...anyways, here i go again... today was sick okay, cos i was totally embarassed, tt's no.1 but the best part was, i was embarassed by someone i think i like! okay, i can't really say whether or not i really like this person cos i mean i've never liked anyone before so how would i know how it feels like right... so ya... but i was really hurt, honestly. and thank goodness i'm good with hiding my feelings cos otherwise, the world would know wad i'm thinking and everything so ya... haiya! whatever! this is seriously sickening... help somebody! but anyways, everyone, just keep feeding me with good news and i'll be up and going in no time ya... meanwhile, i'll continue praying for everyone tt things go smoothly and take care ya.. see ya soon! *hugz* Wednesday, February 16, 2005[Chorus]I don't want another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul You're the one I wanna chase You're the one I wanna hold I wont let another minute go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul I know that you are something special To you I'd be always faithful I want to be what you always needed Then I hope you'll see the heart in me I don't want another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul You're the one I wanna chase You're the one I wanna hold I wont let another minute go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul Your beautiful soul, yeah You might need time to think it over But im just fine moving forward I'll ease your mind If you give me the chance I will never make you cry c`mon lets try I don't want another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul You're the one I wanna chase You're the one I wanna hold I wont let another minute go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul Am I crazy for wanting you Baby do you think you could want me too I don't wanna waste your time Do you see things the way I do I just wanna know if you feel it too There is nothing left to hide I don't want another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul You're the one I wanna chase You're the one I wanna hold I wont let another minute go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul You beautiful soul, yeah This song rocks don't u think... and to think i've heard it so many times and have heard people talk about it so many times but i never knew this was the song they were referring to... this song is really nice... :) oh ya, i know i'm a bit slow lar, but then "unwritten" by natasha beddingfield also rocks and so here's the song! :) I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned Staring at the blank page before you Open up the dirty window Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find Reaching for something in the distance So close you can almost taste it Release your inhibitions Feel the rain on your skin No one else can feel it for you Only you can let it in No one else, no one else Can speak the words on your lips Drench yourself in words unspoken Live your life with arms wide open Today is where your book begins The rest is still unwritten Oh, oh, oh I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way Staring at the blank page before you Open up the dirty window Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find Reaching for something in the distance So close you can almost taste it Release your inhibitions Feel the rain on your skin No one else can feel it for you Only you can let it in No one else, no one else Can speak the words on your lips Drench yourself in words unspoken Live your life with arms wide open Today is where your book begins The rest is still unwritten Feel the rain on your skin No one else can feel it for you Only you can let it in No one else, no one else Can speak the words on your lips Drench yourself in words unspoken Live your life with arms wide open Today is where your book begins The rest is still unwritten Staring at the blank page before you Open up the dirty window Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find Reaching for something in the distance So close you can almost taste it Release your inhibitions Feel the rain on your skin No one else can feel it for you Only you can let it in No one else, no one else Can speak the words on your lips Drench yourself in words unspoken Live your life with arms wide open Today is where your book begins The rest is still unwritten Feel the rain on your skin No one else can feel it for you Only you can let it in No one else, no one else Can speak the words on your lips Drench yourself in words unspoken Live your life with arms wide open Today is where your book begins The rest is still unwritten i'm kinda numb now, i've won many bets u know, people keep thinking there'll be pple falling for me but they're so wrong can... sheesh... anyway, i've got 5 packets of milo from agnes and a meal from nicholas but then i already rejected, but anyhows, i guess being single has have its advantages and disadvantages huh.... haish, oh well, as we always say, let nature go its way... Friday, February 11, 2005HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!! hows everybody eh? i'm sure you're all enjoying all the good food and everything... so am i... and i've been doing nothing except standing and sitting for the past 2 days... so u can just imagine all the unhealthy stuff i'm taking in... and therefore.... i'm playing badminton 2mr!!! haha!! i'm excited... keke...okay i haven't updated for some time so i'm gonna start with new years eve... reunion dinner was great, saw my cousin amy and was she b-eautiful... she's really chio now lar, and slim too... *jealous* ... hehe, no lar, y would i be jealous rite... ah well, so we had reunion dinner at a hotel at orchard in a restaurant called the "soup restaurant". as u all know, i don't really fancy restaurant food especially those that come in packages.. so ya, but the chicken and fish were fabulous, and the soup too! i mean "soup restaurant" is well known for its samsui garlic chicken and soup and they did live up to their name... the fish was pleasantly fresh as well... so i kinda enjoyed tt dinner, though i felt a tinch of awkwardness, or should i say i felt demoralised talking to her cos she's so smart. i mean she's in rjc u know... okay enough of the admiration. so after dinner, according the wad the feng shui master told my uncle, we could only go home after 1a.m. and my mum strongly held on to that, so we went to temples... its templeS mind u, not 1 but 3, as in THREE. well, not tt i mind going to temples but can u imagine how tiring it was.... okay but anyhow, the temple at tampines was the killer temple, know y? cos the whole place was so filled with smoke no one could come out of the temple without teary eyes. i had to stop at every saint cos i was just tearing, and my eyes hurt rally bad. but i still finished my round in the end.... :) okay now day 1 of the new year... i woke up at 7 to bathe and dress up and to FIT IN MY CONTACTS!!! and i tell u something k... i FITTED IN MY CONTACTS WITHOUT HELP!!! come on, i know you all would praise me.... and i did it just once u know... ONCE... amazing rite... i know... i was really jumping mad tt morning k... so happy! haha... okay so i guess tt's all the interesting stuff in day 1... besdies all the house visiting and eating... yup... now day 2... i had a little problem with my contacts tt day... had to push it in say bout twice or trice before i could wear it... but ya, tt's bout all for now... i'm just super tired right now, but looking forward to 2mr's badminton... hehe... -ciao- Monday, February 07, 2005true to your heart you must be true to your heart that's when the heavens will part and baby, shower you with my love open your eyes, your heart can tell you no lies and when you're true to your heart i know its gonna lead you back to me isn't that chorus lovely... i like it! and its got a beautiful tune to go with it too! hehe... :) i tell u all a big BIG secret k... *whispers* chinese new year is in 2 days!!! haha! some sort of a secret huh... anyhow, i'm really excited, i dunno y... hehe met mei yi today, along with 1 of her classmate... hm... i'm really confused now, not sure how i'm feeling... its sickening... and everyone's looking forward to v day excapt me... okay, i don't even want to go to school on that day, i mean for wad... urgh... Sunday, February 06, 2005i just came back form my OG bbq! okay, in fact i came back quite long ago... not really that long ago, to be exact, i came back at around 11.25. i'm super exhausted now... damn tired... but ya, can't sleep cos of my wet hair and i just refuse to use the hair- dryer... yep...the bbq was quite alright... more pple came than i expected... oh ya, i nearly forgot, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHI XIAN!!! i abandoned her at the pit and left early cos ya, like i said, i'm shagged... seriously, and to make it worse, i've got badminton training 2mr morning... oh, but u know what's the best part, i still reached home so late cos agnes and i got lost at pasir ris park. we kinda got lost and couldn't find our way out to the bus stop... sucky i know... urgh, i think we walked for 15 mins and tt added on to my ultra exhaustion... man, i think i'm gonna fall asleep in front of the com... soon... okay anyway, someone said i was cute today, its this guy from speech and drama... and ya lar, was quite surprised, but at least it was a nice surprise.. hehe... anyway arh, cute = ugle but adorable... so ya... get my point? :) anyways i'm going now, super tired... *its fine if no one reads this cos i'm once again, ranting. can u pple just stop teasing us cos i can 200% guarantee u pple tt nothing as in NOTHING is gonna happen between us cos he wants to stay single and u all already know wad i think. but now, i'm just damn afraid, and super scared i'll fall for him... shucks, how could i have said tt... wad the heck... just help me to not fall for him can, so dun tease us ready okay? good. i will NOT and shall NOT fall for him... urgh... wadever... this is irritating... bleah...* Friday, February 04, 2005okay, i'm seriously stunned... honest. i can never imagine the pains a guy will take just to... get into the good books of the girl he likes? oh man.. honestly i'm at a loss for words. i dunno wads it with guys... 1 of my guy classmate is seriously scaring me, i mean he likes this girl and seriously he's going really far... as in going from sengkang to tampines to meet her every morning... this is crazy can.. do every guy do tt? seriously, i'm like having cold sweat for this girl... i honestly dunno how to put it in a nice way tt he should take it slow... as in SLOW... i mean he's gonna scare tt poor soul...okay i'm seriously shocked... i actually have got lots to say today but now, i'm speechless but i seriously have to say something bout tt old bus uncle who drove the 291 today.. he chased my sis off the bus! wanna know y? cos she was drinking a fully covered, confirm won't spill soya bean... wad the heck... okay anyway, its 12.16 now and i'm meeting my fren in 6 hours amd 44 mins... hehe... shall tell u more soon... take care everyone! Tuesday, February 01, 2005i miss S.A.C!!! I MISS ALL MY PALS!!! oh man, i'm just feeling super nostalgic right now... okay just let me crap bout today ya...today my class, 1S16 celebrated the birthday's of all january and february babies... and i was really glad hui ying was touched... :) made me feel good... hehe... and the cake was lovely... just that i think it wasn't big enough a portion for everyone... i guess... but then, everyone came, so i was pretty pleased with that... hehe... okay, and nothing else happened... i'm getting kinda sick in this... oh shucks! i haven't eaten my meds... shall go eat it later.... anyway... i got nothing to say, nothing at all... oh ya, if i haven't added u a testi, pls inform me so i can go add a lovely for u... okay? good... oh to all SAC's tennis pple, good luck for the tournament k.. i'll be praying really hard for u guys... jia you! guess tt's all... i MISS EACH AND EVERY SINGLE 1 OF MY FRIENDS!!! luv ya! *hugz* |